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Alienation of Father and Extended Family by Mother of Children

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Original
Post # 00000025
Alienation of Father and extended family
From: Angela Liggio
Date: 7/7/00
Time: 1:43:11 PM
Remote Name: 198.250.202.200
Alienation of Father and extended family

Comments
I am trying to help my fiancee. He is the father of two children (1 boy and 1 girl). Their mother constantly goes against the family court order. She was even once found guilty of violating this order and found responsible to pay my fiancees' legal fees. To no avail we are unable to collect such fees. 

His ex-wife has been alienating these children from their father. She constantly verbally downgrades him and stops him from having any telephone contact with them. My fiancee is at his last straw. We have been in and out of court for three years and have spent thousands of dollars so that he can see his children. He has joint custody but they kids live with his ex-wife. At the bottom of the family court order, there is a statement "this order to be duly enforced by police officer or peacemaker" they have a mutual drop off and pick-up location at the town police station (ordered by the judge) and she constantly fails to show up. We constantly go inside and tell the officer, but they will not enforce this order and say we need to contact our attorney or the family court and there is nothing that they can do. We have spoken to various state police officers and we have been told that they are supposed to go and pick the children up, locate her and have her come to the police station. 

The last incident she hid out at her sisters house and removed the license plates from her car, the only thing the police did was a drive by and since there was not suspicious activities they would not do anything. I think that the removal of the plates was suspicion enough. We don't know what to do. Also, ever since the begining of my relationship with my fiancee and his children, the mother/ex-wife HATES MY GUTS and I was threatened by her to the point that I had to have her arrested. Last time she was found guilty and an order of protection was given to me and my one year old son. 

Needless to say, this was in March 2000, she violated it and I had to have her arrested again. This time she faces contempt of court charges. Now my fiancees son hates him and does not want to have anything to do with us. He left a vulgar, cursing message on our ans. machine. Then, we found out the the mother/ex-wife was doing drugs and my fiancee called Child Protective Services. We have been interviewed by CPS and she fails to show up or make the appointment. The caseworker had a chance to talk to the daughter at school but since school is out, the caseworker requires that the mother gives permission to talk to the son. The mother will not give this permission. Therefore, the CPS worker has to base her decision with hardly any6 evidence. Something needs to be done to this cruel individual and at every turn we are blown down. HELP! I need advice. She gets away with "murder".
 (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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REPLIES:

Post # 00000050
Re: Alienation of Father and extended family
From: One Who Understands!
Date: 9/24/00
Time: 4:10:07 PM
Remote Name: 38.26.241.156

Comments
We have an "obsessed" ex-wife too. My husband has been divorced from her for over 10 years and has going through this ever since. She can't seem to move on with her life and leave him alone. She too gets away with "murder" and nothing is ever done about it. The stuff she pulls on my husband is unbelievable and always seems to know how to "work the system". She is also very jealous of our marriage/relationship because ours is very loving and fruitful, but there's was miserable. She has tried to break us up several times by her tactics and just get angered more when it doesn't work.
All I can say is document "everything"! Tape record conversations with her and the kid(s). That is what we have started doing and we have a lot of evidence to show just how "sick" she is and how much she is alienating the kids against their father. Unfortunately, the kids live with her and is always listening to lies about their father that they probably believe are true. There is no way that we can recover one of them from her alienating. Our only hope is that he will realize in time that she is the one that ruined his and his father's relationship, not his father.
Good luck and keep us posted...   (Last changed: February 26, 2006 )

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Post # 00000081
Re: Alienation of Father and extended family
From: cate_holley@yahoo.com
Date: 2/12/01
Time: 12:46:59 PM
Remote Name: 208.9.65.2

Comments
I feel for you. I know exactly what you are going through.
Why is it that some women get away with this??
Please e-mail me. We can really relate!  (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

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Post # 00000029
Re: Alienation of Father and extended family
From: mcso40
Date: 7/22/00
Time: 2:24:22 PM
Remote Name: 64.12.105.158

Comments
Your case is sooooo similar to ours. I am the step-mother who 8 years ago was the girl friend. My husband now has custody of his 3 children while the x is on attorney number 5 trying to get them back again. To you I would say, Fight hard!!!! Be sure to have a gaurdian ad litem appointed. Ask for supervised visitation for her and fight with all of your might to get the kids with their father and into counseling. The counseling should be started now. With or without the kids. Find a counselor who is recognized by your courts but do it on your own without a court order, otherwise insurance often won't pay for court ordered counseling. We have been in counseling for 8 years. All because the courts here won't put a stop to her. Hope this helps (Last changed: February 26, 2006)

 

 

 

 

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